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My Name Is...: My Name Is Abi

Abi Blake: I survived domestic abuse and want to help others

My Name Is Abi

BBC Radio 4 - My Name Is..., My Name Is Abi

Abi Blake was beaten to within an inch of her life: she wants to help protect other women.

Abi Blake almost died at the hands of her violent boyfriend, but she managed to escape the relationship and is now using her experiences to help others make changes and stay safe.

In this edition of My Name Is, Abi examines the systems that exist when people are affected by domestic abuse and highlights examples of good practise which might help others in the future. With input from the police, the local authority, the voluntary sector and a forensic psychologist, she casts a spotlight on the issue and finds innovate ways of moving forward.

When Abi met Sebastian Swamy in 2014 she fell for the company boss, who appeared attentive, gentle and loving. But it did not take longer for a much darker side to emerge and in 2017 the violence and verbal abuse culminated in an attack that has left her scarred for life. He was later jailed for three years and four months, with Judge Steven Everett telling him he had shown horrendous behaviour towards his partner and the mother of his child:

He praised Abi for the courage shown throughout the court proceedings and pointed to the serious physical and mental consequences she still endured: "This had a hugely serious and catastrophic effect on her life. You used considerable power and there was a considerable effect. You kicked her to the floor. You stamped on her back. This was a hugely powerful stamp. When she turned over, as there was nothing else she could do, you stamped on the front of her chest. "

Abi is determined to help other women and in this programme she examines a unique police pilot which has seen services overhauled and led to more effective systems for helping victims in her area. She also volunteers at an innovative organisation offering a range of initiatives for victims and their children, who are often left very traumatised by what they witness. 

In her own case she has struggled to accept the way her relationship deteriorated and the violence and control her former partner exerted. She hopes that her recordings will offer others the chance to recognise what might be happening and to know where they can go for help. Above all she wants to see system changes that help children form healthier views of behaviour in relationships and that tackle the shortfalls in the way that cases are handled in the courts.

Producer: Sue Mitchell
Studio Production: Sarah Hockley

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