- Unknown:
- Ian Hislop
- Unknown:
- Nick Newman
- Producer:
- Matthew Francis
- Prime Minister:
- Robert Bathurst
- Clare Phillips:
- Carla Mendonca
- Dillon Phillips:
- Joe Prospero
- Sarah Phillips:
- Emma Sackville
- Duncan Packer:
- Jasper Britton
- Granny Phillips:
- Marcia Warren
- Gary:
- Paterson Joseph
- Lee:
- Dean Cook
- Flash:
- Leagh Conwell
- Trevor:
- David Bauckham
- Jeremy Paxman:
- Himself
- Geezer:
- Joe Gunn
- Lighthouse:
- Luke Newberry
- John Humphrys:
- Himself
- Chancellor:
- Rupert Vansittart
- Home Secretary:
- Michael Fenton Stevens
- Education Secretary:
- Jane Bertish
- Foreign Secretary:
- Neil McCaul
- Trade & Industry Secretary:
- Martin Chamberlain
- Transport Secretary:
- Steve Toussaint
- Health Secretary:
- Amanda Holt
